When it comes to dating in the modern day and age, you need a whole new vocabulary. And while most of us have heard of ghosting by know, you may find yourself utterly confused and shook when your friend tells you, “Ugh, this guy is zombieing me”. To make sure that you know every new dating term that gets thrown your way, we’ve put together this gigantic glossary of all the dating terms you need to know.

Benching \ben·ch·ing\ v: You know when you’re on a sports team, but you’re not actually playing, just waiting on the bench until the coach needs you? I don’t because I didn’t play sports, but this is the dating version of that. Benching is when you’re not into someone enough to commit to them, but you like when they give you attention and validation, so you string them along just enough to have them on the bench, waiting for coach to put them in.

Booty Call \boo·tee·call\ n: A booty call is calling someone on the weekend for sex. Your drunken hookup is just a text away when someone texts you at 1:00am asking if “U Up?”.

Breadcrumbing \bread·crum·ing\ v: The witch to your digital Hansel or Gretel doesn’t even want to cook you in the airfryer. They just want to be wanted. Breadcrumbing is sending flirty but non-committal messages to someone when you’re not interested in dating them but don’t have the guts to break things off completely.

Caspering \kas·per·ing\ n: A friendlier –but still annoying as fuck—type of ghosting. This person hasn’t asked you out again but will still reply nicely to your texts and continue on a conversation.

Cuffing Season \kuh·ffing·see·son \ n: A time during Fall and Winter when people who would normally rather be single or promiscuous find themselves along with the rest of the world desiring to be ‘cuffed’ or tied down by a serious relationship. The cold weather and prolonged indoor activity causes singles to become lonely and desperate to be cuffed.

Cushioning \ku·shon·ing\ n: When you keep flirting with a few “cushions” (other people), just in case your current relationship implodes and you need someone to soften the fall (aka be your rebound). Cushioning is also known as the backup list, because your “cushions” are backup for when you’re single.

Curving \kur·ving\ v: Getting curved is often subtler than a flat-out no. Even if it hurts just the same as a rejection, it carries a name that implies a redirection rather than an outright rejection.

Dicknotized \dick·no·tized\ n: Being hypnotized by the dick. It’s an extremely powerful force that can make a woman so preoccupied with the guy she’s hooking up with. Symptoms include (but are not limited to): losing your own identity, ignoring all of your friends, and ignoring when the guy is sketchy.

DM Slide \dee·em·slide\ n: DM stands for “direct messages” (all the private messaging functions available on all of the major social media networks, mainly Instagram). Sliding implies you’re smooth –most often you’re not– and is the process of entering someone’s direct messages to flirt with them. In the words of Yo Gotti, it goes down in the DM.

Define the Relationship (DTR) \define·the·relay·shun·ship\ n: There should be no great mystery here. Define the Relationship is having the dreaded “so, what are we?” talk where you discuss what you are.

Fielding Season \fee·eld·ing see·son \ n: The more fun and total opposite younger brother of cuffing season, fielding season is so aptly named because it’s the time to keep it cool play the field. Fielding season official begins in late May and ends sometime in September. After all, it’s always best to be single in the summer.

Friends with Benefits (FWB) \friends·with·benefits\ n: A relatively classy way of saying you know someone, you care about them, and are regularly engaging in sexual acts with them, but there are no strings attached. It doesn’t necessarily mean you’re a cold, emotionless robot (but it’s ok if you are!), it just means you would rather be friends who don’t go out on dates and fuck on weekends.

Fuckboy \fuh·ck·boy\ n: A man who wants a girlfriend without the responsibilities of actually having one. They say it’s not really a dating style, but more so a way of life. Also called ‘fuckbois’ or ‘fuccbois’, this type of guy is truly the peak of the millennial dating experience.

Ghosting \go·sting\ v: You know in ghost stories how the ghosts just show up and then disappear all of a sudden? Ghosting is like that, but instead of a poltergeist, it’s your latest crush. It’s more abrupt than breadcrumbing, and harsher than Caspering; the ghoster will suddently stop replying to texts, and the ghostee is usually left feeling confused.

Haunting \hawnt·ing\ v: Apparently social media and dating are now spookier than ever. Haunting is when someone who has previously ghosted you follows you on social media, likes your photos and still watches your Instagram stories just to remind you that they’re still there.

Monkeying \mon·ke·ing\ n: Swinging from person to person without a break in between, like Tarzan swinging on the vines. Enough said.

Netflix and Chill \netflicks·ahnd·chill\ v: “Netflix and chill” is a euphemism for a stay-at-home date that just leads to sex. The name comes from inviting your crush over under the premise of “just taking it easy, we can watch some Netflix and just chill” and then you abandon the movie to hook up.

Read & Not Respond (RNR) \reed·ahnd·not·respahnd\ v: We all know the feeling of sending a text to your crush, super excited to see what they’ll say back. Instead of getting an enthusiastic response to whatever you said, you just get a read receipt “Read at 2:20pm”. Then…nothing. It’s a degrading feeling to the on the receiving end of an RNR. It’s also a PSA to not use read receipts.

Situationship \situ·ay·shun·ship\ n: Do you have a special someone where you hang out with them all the time, have feelings for and are exclusively sleeping with but you don’t have a label or official title? That’s a situationship.

Stashing \sta·sh·ing\ v: Also known as being shady AF, stashing is acting like you’re still single when you’re actually very much in a relationship.

Thirsty \thurs·tee\ v:  Too eager to get something, basically desperate. Thirsty can be used in reference to anything – compliments, validation—but it is mainly used to mean desperate for sex. For example, when you get a message from Chad on Tinder at 2am that seems weirdly overeager for you come over, that boy needs some water because he is THIRSTY.

Thirst trap \thurst·trap\ v: In the animal world, spiders have webs and millennials have thirst traps. They’re intentionally sexually provocative pictures posted to either your Instagram story or feed in order ensare male scrollers into messaging you for attention and validation, or just a good time. Thirst traps can also be used to gain way more likes, as thirsty people will use their likes as a sacrifice to just get laid.

Zombieing \zäm·be·ing\ n: The Walking Dead, but IRL. Zombieing is when someone attempts to come back into your life after ghosting you months prior. You’ll know someone is trying to revive your relationship from the dead when they send you a “hey, how you been?” text out of the blue.

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